


Alice in alternia

by kingmicky101



Category: Alice in Wonderland - Fandom, Homestuck
Genre: Crossover, Homestuck - Freeform, chainsaws, homestuck characters in AIW kinda way, it's a good day for a war, rabbit holes, the beta kids might show up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-16
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-21 09:41:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2463740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingmicky101/pseuds/kingmicky101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>two friends find themselves dragged into a fight between two forces on an entirely different planet<br/>when a grey rabbit in a coat pissed kanaya off, so now trying to find a way back home they have to stop this war<br/>but why is everyone calling them alice? and in the end, will they want to leave?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> help is needed i'm posting this because writers block has consumed me and i feel like posting what i have of my stories now

alice in alternia character roles

alice/s:kanaya: That Rabbit Will Pay For Its Rudeness  
tavros:uHMM I'M NOT SURE IF IT'S SUCH A GOOD IDEA.

mad hatter: gamzee: YoU ReAdY FoR SoMe MoThErFuCkInG tEa~iTs FaYgO FlAvOuReD HoNk!

caterpillar: aradia: its hard t0 say wh0 y0u are n0w but it will bec0me clear soon 0_0

Cheshire dragon: terezi: why 4r3 you 4sk1ng m3 for d1r3ct1ons?  
c4n't you s33 1m bl1nd? H3H3H3

Tweedledee/dumb: sollux and eridan: he 2tarted iit. i did not sol!!

white rabbit: karkat: CAN YOU NOOK SNIFFERS NOT SEE THAT I AM LATE!

march cat: nepeta: ac purrpares to have some tea with her furriend!

dorm mouse: equius: i may be small but i asure you i am quite STRONG!

white queen: feferi:glub! dont you fink thats a bit mean 38(

blue queen: vriska:I SA8D TO PA8NT THEM BLUUUUUUUUE!!!!!!!!

card soldiers: drones: obey, submit, obey,submit

a wind to guide you:john egbert:hello i'm here to be your guide!

a light to guide you: rose lalond: i am here to help you on your way :)

singing flowers:jade harley/dave strider: ooooh lets sing lets sing! kay but imma rap a little a'ight?

THE BEGINNING:  
two friends had been together in their garden having a tea party.  
when suddenly tavros the younger heard something from one of the bushes  
and so they investigated kanaya the older of the two and being the braver one  
approached the bush first and at first glance saw only a grey rabbit  
so she picked it up when suddenly it started yelling at her!  
"HEY YOU NOOK SNIFFING F**kA** CAN'T YOU SEE I'M LATE ENOUGH AS IT ALREADY IS!"  
after his rude out burst he kicked kanayas hand and jumped onto tavros's  
head and started running towards a large rabbit hole.  
kanaya not being one to take such talk picked up her fathers chainsaw and  
began chasing after the rude grey rabbit with tavros close behind  
before she could catch the rude thing it had jumped down the hole and so kanaya stopped  
still furious. but tavros had lost his footing and tripped pushing kanaya and himself into  
the hole.

as they fell they could see the hole turn from dirt and roots to metal cogs clocks and streams  
of fabric. they just couldn't believe their eyes as even they began changing.  
their skin turned grey their eyes turned yellow and then horns appeared atop their heads  
as they were looking around at changing scenery they looked down and noticed ground quickly approaching  
and so they both let out screams as if it would save them and then they landed but  
strangely what appeared to be a wooden floor was actually inflated  
an so they landed softly at least they did until the chainsaw landed popping it  
once they got up they started looking around the room kanaya spotted a tiny door  
and a drink sitting on a table so she walked towards it feeling thirsty  
where as tavros had seen a small plate of cookies and approached that feeling hungry  
once at each end of the room they saw notes one said "drink me!" and the other "EAT ME!" and next to each  
was a key. kanaya knowing better picked the key up placing it in a pocket on her dress  
while tavros just ate a cookie soon regretting it as he suddenly grew bigger and bigger  
"uhm KANAYA CAN YOU uH HELP?"  
kanaya turned around at his booming voice eyes wide and asked "How Did You Do This?!"  
tavros then explained that all he did was eat a cookie she thought about this and  
told him to place one on the ground by the tiny door and take a sip of the drink  
so he did he then started to shrink smaller than kanaya so she took a sip as well shrinking to his size  
and so they walked over to the once tiny door now perfect for their size in hopes that the key she pocketed  
is for this door "perhaps we will find a way back home through here" "uH MAYBE....."  
she proceeds to place the key into the door and turns......*CLICK*  
"phew" the two friends sighed with relief they opend the door and looked out  
to there surprise everything was gigantic "....i guess its a good thing i told you to put the cookie on the ground"  
we would not wish to be so sma-" she had almost finished her sentence when suddenly the door slammed behind her  
knocking them out of the room and onto their butts *oWW THAT REALLY HURT* "indeed that did what caused the door to slam so viol-"  
once again she was interrupted this time by voices bickering in the distance so they decided to investigate  
what they found was quite strange indeed. two boys with grey skin and horns stood in clothes opposite to each others  
one wearing a white t shirt with a black spade and the other in a black t shirt with a white heart bickering  
about where the alices would arrive, wanting to know what an alice was kanaya and tavros approached the two  
"ii 2ay their gonna come outta the room other there!!" "wwell i say their gonna show up at the rivver!"  
"you're ju2t 2ayiing that 2o you can go for a 2wiim" "excuse me but may i ask as to what an alice is?"  
both of the boys turned towards kanaya and tavros and simultaneously shouted "YOU ARE!"  
befor going back to their fight for about 15 seconds before realizing who was standing next to them.  
"AHH WWE'VE GOTTA TELL THE BLUE QUEEN!!""NO WE TELL THE FUSCIA QUEEN!!" then they both ran of in sepret directions  
"tHAT WAS uhm sTRANGE""indeed it was very strange and apparently we are what they call alices?"  
are y0u n0w? y0u d0n't seem quite sure of it RIBBIT w00ps""well of course im not certa- WAIT who's there! come out!"  
i am already 0ut this is a forest where c0uld i be in? and if not an alice wh0 c0uld y0u be?" "kanaya"  
are y0u certain?" a small flying red caterpillar spoke into her ear making her side step and fall over "what on earth are you?!"  
kanaya said frantically trying to pull herself up "n0t 0n earth...""excuse me?""y0u said what 0n earth we're n0t 0n earth"  
t-then where pray tell me are we" kanaya asked sceptically with a hint of concern "alternia of c0urse, and i am a grub but grub is not my name  
no...my name is aradia, h0w am i certain 0f this? i was b0rn with this name alice""can you stop calling me alice it is not my name  
my name is kanaya it is the name i was born with and it is the name i shall stick with""are you certain 0f that?""certain of what"  
"are y0u certain that is the name y0u were b0rn with, were y0u there?""o-of course i was there! it was my birth"  
"h0w d0 y0u kn0w? can y0u remember it?""of course not i was just born!""then h0w d0 y0u kn0w if y0u are n0t s0me one else? i can remember my birth  
it was a warm sum-""please stop! i do not wish to hear this! can you please just tell us why they call us alice?""uH yEAH WHY IS THAT?"  
because it is who you are""we're not-""untill y0u are able t0 pr0ve me wr0ng....lets make a bet...the two of you shall go on a journey  
and at the end of said journey i will call y0u b0th by what y0u pr0ve t0 be-RIBBIT w00ps" the grub i mean aradia said smiling  
"fine you have yourself a deal" kanaya said putting her hand out to shake on it before thinking she is just a tiny grub how could sh-  
kanayas train of thoughts was cut short as a small grub leg latched onto her pinky and began shaking it vigorously "deal" aradia said  
before fluttering back and pointing to a direction just off to the left where an entrance into a forest began "g0 there and the Cheshire drag0n  
will help y0u begin the j0urney!" as the duo walked over entering the forest path they heard aradias voice calling out good luck in her strange cheery robotic voice


	2. ooh no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well it's about time i add something huh? sorry if it sucks

as they continued on into the woods they noticed the thicket of brush grow darker and darker until they were practically blind as bats!  
kanaya started calling out to find out if anyone was there who could help  
"Hello? Is anyone here? Aradia told us you could help!" "WHY 1F 1T 1SN'T TH3 GR34T 4L1C3S!.....1T'S 4BOUT T1M3" >:/  
tavros and kanaya looked up at the voice to find a tree suddenly illuminated and a peeved dragon sitting upon a branch  
"Oh my goodness, you're a dragon!" kanaya gasped out "R34LLY? 1 COULDN'T T3LL H3H3H3H3" the dragon snarked  
"uHMM COULD YOU MAYBE, hELP US OUT? wE NEED TO FIND OUR WAY SO UHM WHICH WAY SHOULD WE GO?"  
"WHY WOULD YOU 4SK M3? YOU 4R3 SO RUD3 C4NT YOU TELL 1'M BL1ND M1ST3R BULLHORN 4L1C3 H4H4H4H4"  
as the dragon continued it's laughter two paths were lit up "B3FOR3 YOU 4R3 TWO CHO1C3S BOTH C4N L34D YOU TO YOUR D3ST1NY  
BUT TH3 OUTCOM3 SH4LL D1FF3R GR34TLY CHOOS3 W1S3LY FOR TH1S SH4LL B3 YOUR F4T3"she dramatically yelled swishing her tail  
the two friends looked at one another thinking over their choices both paths seemed relatively the same and she said BOTH  
lead to their destiny so doesn't that mean that they would meet back up at the end? surely and how different could they be if they supposedly led to the same place?

"We've decided to take separate paths" kanaya said with new resolve  
"uH KANAYA ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS?" tavros was worried about his friends decision what if one got lost? or hurt? the other wouldn't know until it was far too late  
"I'ts okay tavros, look" she held up two chalk sticks "We can leave our mark and make our way back if it leads to a dead end or unwanted destination, besides i believe in you pupa!" kanaya stated matter of factly she even used their old nickname to make him feel better  
which worked as he took a deep breath and stepped forward to grab his chalk nodding to his friend determinedly  
they both walked over to separate entrances said their good byes/lucks and finally entered the maze of forest ahead  
unbeknownst to the both that a certain dragon had a love for chalk and could not resist trailing the two each leaving not a trace behind  
of which way to go leaving them as blind as she to the results of their bravery

tavros had noticed as he walked that it seemed like the wind was following him pushing him along almost playfully which after a while of trying to walk against it decided  
to run with the winds currents to see where it could lead him, though forgetting to leave an X on the trees he'd pass  
he could hear a tune up ahead and followed the sounds to a lit meadow with flowers seemingly dancing with the wind  
or.....not so seemingly as he got closer he saw that they were in fact dancing and singing for two particularly large flowers at the center  
it was odd one of the flowers was singing a beautiful ballad whilst the other was rapping but he couldn't help but think it fit....  
as the song ended he started clapping which got him the attention of the meadows inhabitants and mind you being pushed forward by a rose hurts!  
"well well! you're an odd flower!! haha what are you?" the green one asked him as the red one seemed to fold its leaves and nod at him looking as if to be sizing him up  
"uHH I DON'T......I I'M NOT A FLOWER I'M A PERSON UH TAV-" the green flower gasped "YOU'RE ALICE?! AHHHHH" Tavros was taken aback by the reaction it was a mortified yet.....happy reaction which to him was a pretty odd mix.... "uHH SO YOU'VE HEARD ABOUT ME?....aLSO....mY NAME ISN'T ALICE.." he awkwardly chimed in to her screaming  
the red flower finally spoke up "yeah what's it to you? but i heard there were two john did you lie?" the wind seemed to flow by ruffling the petals of the flowers  
"eh okay, well mister 'not alice' to get past you have to beat one of us in a sing off your choice who, you a rapper or balladette?" "dave that's not even a real word!"  
so the red one was dave.....and whose john? the green one? "oh! how rude!! i am jade this is dave and you've met john. you're Tablet??" the wind made a sort of snickering sound when he realized  
"uHH WAIT THE WIND IS A PERSON?! aND IT'S umm tAVROS" the winds laughter intensified until he could swear he heard an actual voice "silly of course the wind is a person everyone in wonderland has a life" "unless you're a tea junkie they don't" "DAVE don't be rude hatter is a nice guy, odd but nice!" "We're getting off track, 'not alice' rap time!"

with kanaya  
as she walked along she noticed a small light just ahead seeming to guide her she thought it was..... beautiful and as she focused on it she could swear she saw the outlines of a girl around her height before the light was to much to look at, despite it being a kind warm glow it was still bright as the sun  
she didn't really know why she'd just follow a strange light but.....it felt right to do... and so she did  
in the distance she heard laughter and loud chatter which seemed to be where her little light was headed. she blushed at her thoughts......calling the light hers? how silly  
she made it to a clearing with a lit table and around it mismatching chairs some were just crates or over turned buckets and although this was strange the patrons of said table took the cake......or tea? of strange at this little party  
sugar cubes were being thrown into the air landing into floating cups as two figures danced around the table and a stern looking mouse watched from a cup as kanaya stepped closer  
she seemed to have garnered the attention of the others as the tall unruly one in a large top hat suddenly fell over with a honk before grinning up at her  
"ac sees a lovely alice has decided to join us! would you like some tea the fierce lioness shouts with glee!" the younger looking girl who looked part cat bounded towards her grabbing her hand to lead her to the table "Uhhm my name is Kanaya not alice but well i suppose a small tea party wouldn't hurt"  
she was wrong......a mad hatter tea party was never small and as she sat confused as to why the tea never stayed in a single cup realised now why they were dancing around the table like loons grabbing at the different cups this was the oddest tea party she had been to......though she found it quite fun "So LiTtLe MiSsY rOsEy LeAd ThE wAy FoR yA hUh?"the hatter said gamzee she believes it was but who was rosey?  
she remembered the light that brought her here she did note it looked.....humanoid looking around she found it waiting off to the side. smiling at it she was about to reply to the hatter when a familiar grey blur bounded forward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yup i can't rap so i cut it there sorry kiddies also i am still so sorry that it has taken me a year to remember i wrote this so here it is friends! grammar still sucks but at least it finally happened


	3. enter queens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boy has this been at the bottom of the barrel long enough  
> sorry folks severe writers block and change of fandoms i just didnt get around to this ._. not that many were reading this or care anymore i just felt it was about time i at least tried :/   
> tho it definitely lost track long ago

the rabbit bounded into the clearing barely stopping before crashing into the table and jumped atop it with ease "OKAY ASSHATS ACT NATURAL!!..SCRATCH THAT ACT LIKE ANYTHING BUT YOURSELVES BLUE QUEEN INBOUND" he dove into a small grey chair just as a trumpet went off. kanaya sat up straighter still confused and partially wanted at the rabbit now that he was here but knowing better than to act uncivilized before a queen...

"well helloooooooo l8sers!!!!!!!!" never mind kanaya thought as a women in a messy spider silk dress shoved aside the trumpeteer and strode up to the table with a large grin.  
what a horrid personality........  
"i thought i told you 8afoons to tell me about the next tea party? DO YOU WANT A 8EHEADING???????? now pour my tea it's my unbirthday today!" the queen kicked her feet onto the table smashing a cup in the process   
'unbirthday'? kanaya thought to herself what on earth was that? "um might i ask what an unbirt-" before she could finish her question the hatter and mad cat girl jumped excitedly at the word "UnBiRtHdAy?!! why didnt you say so spideress?? the mighty huntress questions?? An UnBiRtHdAy OnLy CoMeS 364 DaYs A yEaR ac would have celpurrbrated purrlier if she had known!!!HoNk" what a foolish thing to celebrate every day around your birthday it wouldn't be special if you acted like that.... "soooooooo who's the new dimwit?" the queen said still smiling smugly with a cup of tea 

oh that was it "now see here you insensitive self centered brat! you may be a queen but that gives you no right to talk to your subjects like that and especially not a stranger who you've only just met! what rude behavior!!" kanaya burst she would not stand for this queen or not. the giggly duo burst into laughter before seeing their queens face and suddenly their faces dropped "your meowjesty would you like a second p-" the queens face was turning a bright blue before finally she stood screaming "OFF WITH HEEEEEEEER HEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAD!!!!!!!!" she stomped towards kanaya practically steaming "hoooooooow dare you you-!!" before she could finish a loud bang went off and everyone turned to see a puff of red dust and something go flying through the air screaming. in the queens distraction nepeta jumped across the table shoving a bottle into kanayas mouth without a warning she began shrinking at a quick rate nepeta swept her off the floor and threw her to the mouse who caught her with great grace and strength before dropping her into an empty tea pot and shooshing her

turning back queen serket noticed the horrid twerp was gone "WHERE DID SHE GO????????!!!!!!!!" she screeched "ac does not know but your meowjesty should not worry about her!"  
"and WHY is that?!" "WoOoOAaAHhH~ wAs ThAt A mOtHeRfUcKiN fLyIn ScReAmIn BuTtErCuP?" nepeta jumped at the chance "ac agrees that was defurrnetly a flying screaming buttercup very rare and magic flower why if it weren't tea time ac would be chasing it down for the boons she would surely get fur such a treasure!"  
"treasure you say" the queen questioned thankfully buying the bait "guards file out we WILL find that flower!!!!!!!!" with a flourish she strode out of the clearing with all her guards trailing her "phew ac sighs in relief" "NaAaW nOw ThAt I tHiNk AbOuT iT I dOn'T bE ThInKiN tHeRe'S sUcH a ThInG aS a FlyIn FlOwEr hEhEhE HoNk wOoPs :o)" the strong mouse reached down into the pot and gently pulled kanaya up and out of it "are you...alright alice?" equius she believed his name was questioned "i'm quite fine th- before she could continue the rabbit spoke up "WAY TO GO YOU NOOK SNIFFING FOOL PISS OF THE QUEEN AND DIE PREMATURELY THAT'LL HELP YOUR JOURNEY!! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING???" kanaya was still frightened but she wouldnt let someone else insult her "i wasn't going to let her be so rude! it was cruel she had no right to speak that way and i didn't know she'd try to kill me for it!" "WELCOME TO WONDERLAND ALICE GET WITH THE PROGRAM!" "how would i know anything about a silly dream before i've had it! and i am NOT ALICE! this has gone on quite long enough i expect an explanation NOW or or..." OR WHAT?!" "or i'll wake up and never dream this silly thing again! she said pinching her arm for emphasis but she soon yelped in pain from it "WAIT YOU THOUGHT THIS WAS A DREAM?" slightly embarrassed she replied "well where else would i find dragons talking rabbits and psycho queens in the middle of a forest???! i need an explanation please!!" "OK OK FINE YOU WANT AN EXPLANATION SO DO I! BECAUSE YOU ARE NO ALICE! GAM PACK UP YOUR TEA WE'RE GOING TO THE PINK QUEEN!"

up next tavros update


End file.
